5 de mai. de 2010

Coisas que você só sabe quando fica desempregado


- Depois da roda, o sofá foi a melhor invenção do homem.

- Depois do sofá, a tevê foi a melhor invenção do homem.

- Depois da tevê, o laptop foi a melhor invenção do homem.

- Seu peso está diretamente relacionado ao tempo que você fica em casa.

- Pijamas, se não tirados após uma noite de sono, grudam no corpo.

- Serviços de telemarketing estão sempre ligando para estar oferecendo milhões de vantagens (hã-hãm) exclusivas - de hora em hora, cronometradamente.

- O porteiro e o zelador sabem muito mais de futebol que eu.

- Cebolas ainda me fazem chorar como uma criança.

- A carne do açougue é muito mais fresquinha e barata.

- A manga rosa custa 3x mais que a fiapenta (que assim como o nenê dos Rugrats, chama Tommy).

- Pastel de feira faz meu dia mais feliz.

- No fim de feira tem abacaxi por 1 real!

- O café feito em casa é bem melhor que o do serviço.

- A Diarista faz em 8 horas o que eu não faria em 80.

- A Sessão da Tarde não é mais como era antigamente.

- Malhação não é mais como era antigamente.

- A MTV não é mais como era antigamente.

- A tevê, apesar de ser TOP3 eurekas, não tem mais aquela magia de antigamente.

- Porra, cadê a Palmirinha?

- Os desenhos ficaram mais complexos (ou eu fiquei mais burro?)

- Existem pessoas que são capazes de dialogar com seu cachorro como se fosse um amigo íntimo, sem sequer te dar boa tarde.

- O cachorro é mesmo o melhor amigo do homem.

- Putz, como é bom ser cachorro!

- Depois do laptop, a máquina de lavar louças foi a melhor invenção do homem.

- Os domingos são bem mais legais do que parecem.

- Acordar cedo todo dia para correr no Ibirapuera é uma ilusão.

- Dormir cedo todo dia para ter uma vida mais saudável é uma ilusão.

- Achar que agora sim você vai espremer laranjas e descascar cenouras é uma ilusão.

- Seu currículo não é tão legal quanto você pensava.

- É mais fácil fazer nhoque artesanal do que responderem email com seu CV pleiteando uma vaga na empresa.

- Pra quê diabos tantos CDs e DVDs?
 
- Ficar 1 dia no sofá é bom, 5 é ótimo e 10 começa a bater o desespero.

- Ter tempo disponível não necessariamente significa utilizá-lo bem.

- A internet é a celebração infinita do ócio.




47 comentários:

BJ disse...

"Existem pessoas que são capazes de dialogar com seu cachorro como se fosse um amigo íntimo, sem sequer te dar boa tarde."

Como pode, né?

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Experimente torcer um jogo de lençol king size na mão e você verá que a invenção da máquina de lavar roupa supera de longe a invenção da máquina de lavar louça!

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Odára Raquel Kunkler disse...

A Palmirinha tá na TV Gazeta, lá pras 13hs. Minha vó não perde uma receita. Viu "amiguinha"?!

Boa sorte!

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Um dia inteiro no sofá e eu já fico feito doida. Desespero.

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